Category Archives: Social Conditioning

Social Conditioning

Would You Believe?

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My Theology teacher as well as my Ethics teacher, now both dead,  taught me otherwise. But at age 73 I am inclined to believe Rabbi Darfour Brickner who wrote :

“God does not do or bring justice to the world. God is an ideal, the representation of perfect justice.”

“The burden of making justice work is placed on us, not on divinity.”

“When and if we do things that make for more justice in society, we are bringing God into the world.”

“Praying in a way that makes us conscious of our responsibilities to a world that needs justice can be very helpful to us. It eliminates our having to blame God for our failure or to accuse God of impotence when justice is denied or improperly executed.”

“God, then, is the power that helps us bring justice into the world as we conceive that ideal and work to bring it into our lives.”

“God seen in this way is a power or a face that inspires, not a person who acts on oue specific issues.”

God Is.

We Do.

Equanimity

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According to Sylvia Boorstein: ” I am committed to the idea that equanimity in the mind is the foundation of wisdom and that  wisdom sustains the mind’s capacity to respond with benevolence. Effort, concentration and mindfulness are the internal way in which the mind returns itself from being out of balance and lost in confusion to a condition of ease, clarity and wisdom.”

Since June 23, I have had all sorts of challenges. July 8. I had to deal with challenges from Emil. I mustered all I learned from Boorstein, Tamura, Edwards, Grabhorn etc. and slept soundly on a windy, stormy night.

July 9. I experienced a kind of clarity. I checked out a big carton box on top of a tall cabinet. Surprise! A duster that had been missing since March manifested. I judged our pick-up/deliver laundry service as being careless for losing my old but comfy duster.

This is not the first time I have been proved wrong. July 13 at night. Another challenge. Just when I was about to go to bed Emil asks for a volume of English Literature!

We could not locate it. At first I was agitated. Then I remembered my 4 guidelines. After a while I announced I would not even bother to look for the big book. After I surrendered I was at peace.

Boorstein wrote: “I have no idea whether this changed circumstance which I resent, is actually a good or bad thing in the long run. I can’t wait to see.”

July 17. I checked AGAIN the bottom shelf of a cabinet that I had checked at least twice in the past. There covered by a Chinese frame was the precious Literature book!

Reach out for a Solution

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This is the fourth and last guideline for my healthy and peaceful life style.
I believe the answers are already blowing in the wind. No need to rack my mind with analysis which end up like ruminations anyway. I believe the answers are at best within me. But I must be in the right disposition to hear. This means going to my finer self.
No need to do case studies. I am too old for such at 73. No need for analysis that leads to paralysis. I just have to allow the intuitive in me to bubble up.
There is no need to struggle. I learned from Lynn Grabhorn in “Beyond the Twelve Steps” that God wants me to have everything. All I need to do is access his gifts.
According to M.Tamura: “truth is within. It is never outside our being.”
He continued: Give power to your inner being, that’s always in touch with God. There is no standard ‘right’ or ‘better’ choice. Remember, the truth is in you, not in the choices. You can consult others for information and opinions , but only to find and validate your own intuitive knowing.”
“If we pollute our awareness with ignorance, indifference, resistance, attachment and powerlessness, we would not be able to express the omniscience, omnipresence, and omnipotence of divinity.”
“Life must be able to flow through our body unimpeded. We must truly let our light shine.”

Understanding the situation/s

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Experience has taught me how wrong many of my initial impressions are. My immediate reactions are usually resistant. I hardly give room for wisdom to guide me. I keep forgetting what I have learned from my favorite authors.
Now, I sometimes laugh at how foolish ,even arrogant, I have been. I have been angry, frustrated, disappointed, frightened etc at situations which I thought were specifically sent to punish me. Why me? Indeed, why me? among the millions, even billions in the universe.
What adds to my resentments is my wrong interpretation of the Law of Attraction. What did I do to merit this? Again, Why me? But it’s not about deserving. It’s a matching of vibrations.
Boorstein wrote: “Remember whatever is happening will change, and what you add to th situation is part of the change. Agonizing makes it worse.”
Laura Day wrote something similar: “Things are what they are. Ruminating won’t change them nor will it provide an insurance policy for avoiding pain in the future.”

Michael Tamura has written the most significant reminder for me: “when crises arise in your life, they aren’t due to something inherently wrong with you. Although you may take them personally, situations in your life don’t happen to you. They just happen and you are involved in them according to the way you respond to [them].”

The above certainly does not allow me to ask: “Why, me?”

Tamura also wrote: “If you are reaching deeper within yourself with compassion, perseverance, and forgiveness as you work toward the goal or victory then you learn and grow. And that makes you capable.”

Another nugget of wisdom from Tamura said: “The more we can disengage our awareness from reactive emotion and reclaim our neutrality, the better we can realign ourselves to our soul energies, awareness and purpose.”

Managing the Emotions

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What I wrote about the finer self was too idealistic. I believe the following from Boorstein is doable:
“…the natural mind …is free of tensions and doesn’t allow attachments to become entrenched. Preferences arise, but they dissipate without causing problems when the mind is relaxed. Annoyance also arises, but it doesn’t take up residence. Fears and hurts, feelings, doubts and desires, all come up in response to challenges and disappointments but they don’t linger; they don’t upset basic clarity.”
What a relief to read that challenges and disappointments are not only real but that they can be surmounted.
Specifically, to manage emotions Boorstein wrote: “Using concentration, settle the mind to ground it to some composure.” I am glad there is something from my school, church, home training that I can use: composure.
“Try to stay unconfused and connected to your own kindness.” This is hard for me. With my penchant for ruminations and my so-called management training and development courses, my natural bent for analysis is a burden.
“Remember, whatever is happening will change, and what you add to the situation is part of the change. Agonizing makes it worse.”
“You do the best you can, and then you live with what happens. What else can you do?”
“Tell yourself, Sweetheart, you are in pain. Relax. Take a breath. Let’ pay attention to what’s happening then we’ll figure  out what to do.”