Lately, I have yet another realization, a significant one for me. I am definitely an unfinished product as yet. I am still evolving.

I am back with Sylvia Boorstein whom I consider the mildest of my favorite models. I have realized how useful her suggestion regarding a CLEAR MIND and an OPEN HEART.

True. I live in roller coaster times. So does our daughter whom I want to help from being overwhelmed. BEEN THERE. DONE THAT.

Lately, with health issues cropping from nowhere I felt pushed to near despair. I was forced to review old guidelines from Sylvia Boorstein. Her Buddhist/Jewish background assured me I won’t get any airy-fairy help , the way I would from those leaning towards the “Law of Attraction” paradigm.

I have realized that with a CLEAR MIND I can sift through the INTERNET info and choose what applies to me. As usual, I don’t belong to the published categories. I have always been a marginal case in mainstream medicines.

CLEAR MIND has to partner with an OPEN HEART. I have tried two types of different massages: Cupping and hot compress.

I appreciate what both have done to my body.

I thank God that i am as yet not a finished product! I still have many dreams. I still dream of living in a country where religion does not determine significantly the lives of people. Why not live according to spiritual values where each one follows his pathway back to Source.

I dream of being able to walk comfortably even with a cane . i would like to take long walk along tree-lined streets the way i did in Sydney in the early 2000s. where cars really stop to allow pedestrians, young or old to cross.

I would like to walk leisurely to the supermarket, alone, and back passing by friendly shops including a quaint bookstore which lends eyeglasses! This was Sydney in the early 2000s.

I dream of being able to meet personally Serge Kahili King and discuss the 7 principles of Urban Shamanism.

I dream …

I don’t want anybody to go through the agony I went through lately. For around 4 or 5 days I experienced horrible ocular migraines. I have not been experiencing such since last October. But then it lasted for only a few minutes.

For all my consciousness work I have been doing. For all the essays about my being my best doctor. For all the essays i have been writing about living my own pathway and not believing that this is a valley of tears. and to think that my last essay was on TRANSMUTATION of PAIN.

I felt my whole world was crashing on me. The very first two days were excruciating since I refuse to take painkillers because my internet research deemed all painkillers as a no no to hypertensives. and indeed my BP rose even without the painkillers.

I noticed my PAIN TRANSMUTATION protocol was blessing our daughter in Mumbai. Emil was getting more and more projects and teaching loads. My plants were growing wild with fertilizers produced by my TRANSMUTING MIND. But why was I myself so challenged health-wise?

I was tempted to drop the whole spirituality pathway via my non religious worldview, the learnings from Dr Lipton, Gary Zukov, Mike Dooley , Neale Walsch etc.

But then when I went to Facebook I was greeted by posts of Neale Walsch and Mike Dooley which spoke to me. I was affirmed.

So I am seeing an eye doctor soonest.

So I am back to listening and watching tapes like: “Try Yourself/ Miracle Happens within a minute get good news (There are at least 3 versions).