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My current Awakenings

This essay is based on my interpretations of the writings of: Neale Walsch, Bro. Andrew Gonzalez, Wayne Dyer, Esther Hicks, Dr Christine Page, Bro James Ebner, M. Tamura, Gill Edwards etc.

Dr Lipton’s posts on Facebook have been a significant factor in my cosmology.

Dr Jean Netario Cruz has been a living model for not only a healthy life but more so for well-being.

I have been influenced by the quotations of Einstein as posted on Facebook. I owe a lot to my dialogues with my husband whom i consider as smartest next to God but not necessarily the holiest.  As a rule, I initially disagree with him. My Inner Child feels superior to him. But my Higher Self knows better. Now that he is into tending my garden, he has better and scientific inventions for the garden.

Our only daughter sometimes plays the role of student but very often she becomes my teacher.

I have learned the very hard way to accept whatever is. Then I go within. I listen to my Higher Self. i recall that i came into thi life with forgetfulness. M. Tamura wrote something about memory and the forbidden fruit of knowledge. I suspect this is what is traditionally known as ORIGINAL SIN.

I take time before responding. But not every time. I even get help from my plants after all they belong to a more expanded realm of consciousness.

Last April 13, initially I reacted instead of responding. I received a strange texted message from an unfamiliar number asking me to write to a strange email address.

I fell into the trap of reactivity. It took some time before I consulted my Higher Self.

Acceptance would mean no resistance but not necessarily to be reactive. Acceptance would shift my energy. My mind would be clear.Shortly even the feelings/mood will shift. What often helps is to be grateful for something or for someone.

Of course, from experience I know it takes self-mastery not to be reactive. It takes resolve not to do the usual complaining which builds up a lousy mood. Negativity escalates and energy shifting gets more difficult. One trick I have learned is to be in agreement with something or somebody; then positive energy is generated.

Honor Thyself

Gill Edwards: “I believe that our first responsibility is to make our own lives work.”

Mike Dooley has a more detailed statement: “Our first responsibility in life is not to make the world a better place or to tend to the less fortunate but to live up to our own high standards, to act with faith that our dreams are meant to be and to maintain a tolerance and compassion for our own divine journey.”

Dooley indeed confirms we are made to the image and likeness of God. It strengthens my belief that before we came to this life we knew what we were supposed to do. We knew who we were. But we forgot everything when we came to this life. Forgetfulness just may be the Original Sin of religion.

I certainly like Dooley’s statement. It heals me of the compelling social burden imposed by both the Church and the school during all my past. I learned from both Gill Edwards and Mike Dooley in my late 60s!!!

“By being so responsible to ourselves, the world will become a better place and those around you will richly benefit not just from the love you’d share but for the example you become.”       (Dooley)

Carolyn Myss is even kinder:”Spiritual instruction teaches us to keep our focus on ourselves – not in an egocentric way but as a way of consciously managing our energy and power.”

Carolyn Myss may as well teach mental hygiene!!!!! She could very well prevent depressions.

My Redemption

O’Murchu: “Redemption is a divine-human process of befriending those elements of our experience which threatens our security and integrity, rather than an act of rescue by an external, divine agent.”

I resonate deeply with the above paragraph. At this point allowing my husband to follow his path threatens my security. His frequent trips and days away for seminars create havoc by way of of my Inner Child and ISTJ personality, draining my energy through intensive conflict with my Higher Self.

The easier way is to just listen to my Inner Child and my ISTJ personality and go back to controlling. But I have tasted he joy and glory of self-mastery and responding creatively to situations. I have experienced how it is to create my own reality! I know how it is to be divine.
I have personally experienced that it is not God who sends trials, tribulations, challenges etc.    I have been helped by Hicks, Dr Page, Alan Seale, M. Tamura, Tato Malay etc.

Healing, like redemption, requires taking actions. “It is not a passive event. we are meant to draw on our inner resources, to find the material strength to leave behind our out-moded beliefs and behaviors and to  see ourselves in new, healthy ways to take up our beds and walk.”     (Caroline Myss)

I have to recall that I have drawn the distinction between the universe and my God. This is my response to the teachings of Esther Hicks about the law of attraction. I need to trust the Ho’oponopono more – to clear my memories.

I opt to be firm in my resolve not to blame anything nor anybody, much less God. I refuse to attribute pains, challenges etc to God.

Taking good care of my body is key. I need to remember: “I was so anxious that I was blocking my awareness of hat was going on at a more subtle level.”  (Dr William Bloom)

Dr Sarno believes that all pain is caused by oxygen depletion. I need to guard against my emotions constricting my muscles and my blood vessels. I can use my WAKI pen more. I can apply Dr Netario Cruz’ magnesium more often to help me obtain more oxygen.

For now I will have to be helped by oral medicines to manage my stomach and body aches. But I expect to liberate myself soon.

“Spiritual instruction teaches us to keep our focus on ourselves – not in an egocentric way but as a way of consciously managing our energy and power.”    (Caroline Myss)

I firmly believe I can create my reality.

Inner Work


“We each have acquired a perspective about the nature of life.”   (Jim Gilkeson)
“The process of learning anything new can force us to revise the stories we tell ourselves, and the belief structures that
live within us, for these flavor our perceptions of the world and determine what we UNDERSTAND, ACCEPT and REJECT. ”  (Jim Gilkeson)

The above paragraphs explain why I claim: I am my best doctor; Healing is ultimately self-healing; I choose to allow my husband and our daughter to follow their individual paths even if they turn out to be unlike what I envisioned when I was still  consciously an ISTJ.

“This is what people often mean when they say we each create  our own experience of the world.”   (Jim Gilkeson)

Through months of darkness of our daughter in London, I opted to create my own reality where she would triumph over her challenges. Supporting her while seriously working on my own healing was overwhelming. This was compounded by the very hectic schedule of my husband with trips and days away for seminars. I had a hard time not being resentful; I had proclaimed my intention to allow both my husband and our daughter to follow their individual pathways.

I went over my experiences in the 90s when I had severe clinical depression. I vowed not to wallow in negativity. I believed with my body and soul and spirit that I had been given all the gifts I would need before I came to this life.

“That concept becomes increasingly apparent as we work at the energetic level, where we are challenged to interpret expressions without the usual reference points.”    (Jim Gilkeson)

“The result of our inner work is far more valuable to the soul than outside accomplishments for in reality it is only the former that can pass with us into death.”   (DR. Page)

I am still alive after the challenges and enjoying the fruits of my inner work. Definitely without the usual reference points!