Two Sundays ago because of strong winds I stayed home in prayer. Reviewing a   book of Sylvia Boorstein, a practising psychotherapist, a Buddhist teacher and a practising Jew  gave me  a bit of clarity. I finally got some answers to burning questions  my Church told me not to entertain but simply to accept in Faith. But my mind has not been accepting. I read that George Sison who used to be a daily mass goer and communicant for many years also could not accept certain things in Faith.

I realized that I have been highly critical of my Church because I have been seeing her as a club. A club to me is an organization requiring dues in exchange of services. amenities etc. Obviously my Church has not met many of my expectations.

Of course I remember how in London last May I was reminded by two friends of our daughter that “I am the Church”.

I realized with the help of Neale Walsch that my Church preaches:”…Judgment, condemnation, and punishment in the after life and that frightening prospect is the chief tool of member recruitment and retention for most religions.”

A wonderful offshoot of my day in prayer , thanks to Sylvia Boorstein was:”The 2nd of the Noble truths differentiates between inevitable pains of life and the extra pain created in the mind that struggles rather than accommodates.”

“The words attachment and clinging are used to describe the tension that arises in the mind when it is unable to accept what is true.”

Even better than the above: “The natural mind… is free of tension and doesn’t allow attachments to become entrenched.”

“Preferences arise, but they dissipate without causing problems when the mind is relaxed. Annoyances also arise , but they don’t take up residence. Fears and hurt feelings , doubts and desires all come up in response to challenges and disappointments, but they don’t linger. They don’t upset basic clarity. The elegant expression for this… is all defilements are self-liberating in the great space of awareness.